How to Choose An Egg Donor
Having spent twenty years as a fertility counselor, I have helped thousands of intended parents find an egg donor. This is a journey that few people are prepared to make. There is often a very surreal feeling to viewing egg donor profiles to find the woman who will enable you to build your family. No intended parent wants to have to master this steep learning curve when their goal is to have a baby. Our goal is to help intended parents find the best possible candidates so that they can move forward with a minimal amount of stress.
To that end my best advice is:
- First and foremost you want to choose a candidate who has a good health background
- Realize that we are all unique and irreplaceable so look for someone you like for who she is not for being just like you
- Look for someone who could plausibly blend into your family with regard to physical traits, but don’t over-think this!
- Her family should also have good physical and mental health history
- Remember everyone is likely to have some family health issues but try to avoid hereditary issues that you would like to avoid adding to your families gene pool such as: cystic fibrosis, fragile X, non-environmental cancers before the age of 40, type 1 diabetes, family history of depression or other mental health issues to name a few
- Choose an egg donor who demonstrates reasonable intelligence. Remember you and your partner will be raising this child and environment plays a big role in a child’s intellectual development
- Choose the donor who you can say “I like her” - someone who seems like she could be your friend or that you would be proud to have as a daughter
In the long run there is no such thing as the perfect egg donor. The only perfect egg donor is the one who allows you to have a baby. There are a variety of possible options available, with roughly 28,000 egg donors across the United States. Finding someone can be challenging but it is possible to find a healthy egg donor, someone who is bright and who wants to help you to have the child or your dreams.
