12 Step Program for TTC (Trying to Conceive) by Gail Sexton Anderson
There are 12-step programs for just about everything. So, what about a 12-step program for intended parents trying to conceive or TTC? I've worked with intended parents trying to conceive for 14 years and helped hundreds of intended parents find their way to the other side. I think that it's time for the TTC to have a 12-step plan of their own.
1. Admit you are not in control of your fertility.
2. Understand that infertility is not a flaw but a physical reality like the color of your eyes.
3. Come to an understanding that a Power greater than yourself has a plan for you and that only once you have moved through your pain can you appreciate your options.
4. Let go of trying to control things as it will only make you crazy.
5. Learn that there is freedom in trusting your higher Power.
6. Allow yourself time to mourn your losses.
7. Experience the denial and isolation because you must, but remember you are not alone.
8. Rage, as you will, at yourself, your partner, your doctor and everyone else who seems to be able to have children so easily.
9. Bargain with your higher Power, that you will do anything, anything at all if only you could have a child.
10. Allow yourself to experience depression when the road to parenthood looks and feels like a painful uphill battle because at times it is.
11. Realize that you can only move forward in acceptance of your reality when you have completed morning your losses.
12. Remember that your higher Power does have a plan for you and that you will have the child who was always meant to be yours, even if the timing may not be what you had in mind.